Peter Disowns Jesus

66 While Peter was below in the courtyard, one of the servant girls of the high priest came by. 67 When she saw Peter warming himself, she looked closely at him.“You also were with that Nazarene, Jesus,” she said. 68 But he denied it. “I don’t know or understand what you’re talking about,” he said, and went out into the entryway. 69 When the servant girl saw him there, she said again to those standing around, “This fellow is one of them.” 70 Again he denied it. After a little while, those standing near said to Peter, “Surely you are one of them, for you are a Galilean.” 71 He began to call down curses, and he swore to them, “I don’t know this man you’re talking about.” 72 Immediately the rooster crowed the second time. Then Peter remembered the word Jesus had spoken to him: “Before the rooster crows twice you will disown me three times.” And he broke down and wept.

Reflection:
Yesterday when we left Peter he was mixing in with the crowd, wanting to see what happened to Jesus, but not wanting to be recognized. When one of the servant girls recognized him she said, "Weren't you with that Nazarene, Jesus?" This is a reminder of Jesus' humble upbringing in what today we would consider the country. Peter makes his first denial. She found him again, she questioned him again, and again he denied it. Finally, the others saw him and confirmed he was with Jesus because he was a Galilean, and a Galilean wouldn't normally be in Jerusalem unless it was a festival. In his last denial, Peter was so adamant he called down curses and swore saying, "I don't know the man!"

Peter then remembered Jesus' prophecy when the rooster crowed twice. He broke down and wept at his lack of faithfulness for his friend. Later Peter would redeem himself, but now he was bitterly ashamed of himself. One can feel guilt for doing the wrong thing, or feel shame for who you view yourself to be. Shame is one of the most toxic emotions we can have as a human being, and leads to all kinds of psychological problems. Part of it was predicated on Peter saying, "I will never deny you, even if all the rest do!" Peter talked brashly and wasn't able to back it up with his actions.

Yesterday Peter followed at a distance, and today he denied him three times. It was a gradual process. I wonder how we began to deny Jesus subtly and slowly. Maybe it is cutting the corner, or failing to stick up for your faith when you are prompted to do so. Later in the power of the Holy Spirit, Peter will courageously defend the Christian faith. In the flesh he shrunk back in fear and in self preservation. While Jesus came to bring us abundant life, we also are told to pick up our own cross and follow Jesus. This will certainly happen in a different context than the apostle Peter, but we will certainly be tempted to do likewise. It is in these situations that Luke 12 and Matthew 10 tell us that when are brought before others to give testimony for Jesus, the Holy Spirit will give us the words to say. Although we are called to be faithful, Jesus is always with us through the Holy Spirit to do so.

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